Making time to care for your own needs as a mother can be very challenging. By the time you’ve met the needs of children, husband, work, household, extended family, school etc. there seems to be no time – or energy – left to nurture yourself.
I am sure you’ve heard many times before the analogy of considering time for yourself and self care as being the oxygen mask on a plan. “Please fit your own oxygen mask before fitting children”. Please care for yourself first so you can care for others.
I attend events frequently where a guest speaker repeats this analogy and a room full of exhausted and overwhelmed mums nod their heads strongly. I can see them vowing to go home and put on their own oxygen mask. Except that I know most of them won’t actually do it. What gets in the way?
As a life coach, one of the most common obstacles I see mums I work with encounter is their belief system.
No matter how far we’ve come in our journey as independent women in the world, when it comes to our role as a mother we seem to default to the position that everyone else’s needs should come before our own. Our “job” is to ensure the wellbeing of our children and family unit even if it means depriving ourselves of self-care for years on end.
This seems crazy when you read it but it feels totally normal when you are living it.
Stop and consider for a moment that these things do not have to be mutually exclusive. You don’t have to sacrifice your own needs in order to be a brilliant, wonderful mother. I am actually a better mother when I am taking my own self-care seriously.
Self-Care is NOT a luxury. It is an essential part of your being. Self-care helps give us the energy to give and give and give to our children. It helps preserve our patience and sanity. It helps us feel valued in the world and creates a deeper sense of connection and joy within our family unit.
Self-care is a constant work in progress. No matter how well or how poorly you currently feel you are caring for your own needs take a moment now to recommit to yourself. Say to yourself every morning: “My self care matters. It is important and today I choose to take one action to honour it”.
If you are ready to put your oxygen mask on and would like some support and inspiration to kick-start you then please join me. I would love to have you.