The best thing you can do for your kids is to be a happy mum. But to do so you have to make yourself a priority. Relationship experts would argue that the order should be self, marriage and then kids.
If you put yourself last too often you can end up being bitter and resentful. If you put your partner last too often, he will end up being bitter and resentful. If you don’t make yourself AND your relationship a priority ultimately the kids will suffer.
In a family unit everyone’s happiness is interconnected; so don’t underestimate the importance of your own contentment. And don’t feel guilty about putting your own needs first for a change. Children model their behaviour on our own, and do you really want them to grow up thinking their needs should always be the ones to come last? Of course you don’t.
Happiness and contentment are found in the little moments, you just need to know where to look:
Steal a moment
Steal just 15 minutes for yourself in your chaotic day, and recharge your batteries. Step away from the laundry, your laptop. Take a moment away from picking up the toys and head outside. Breathe in some fresh air, and sip on a cup of tea. Savour the peace and quiet.
Schedule a moment
Take time everyday to do something you love. Listen to your favourite song, read a few chapters of your book, go for a run, crochet, write. Whatever it is that you enjoy, make sure you schedule it into your day. If you don’t make time for it, it won’t happen.
Take a moment to pamper yourself
Give yourself a quick manicure, a facial mask, blow dry your hair or soak in a big bubble bath. Pamper yourself at least once a week. You will feel happier. And sexier.
Make magic in the moment
Kiss your child, hug your partner. Build spontaneity into your life by doing little things that are fun and special. It might be a simple treat, a little flower, a wild dance, reminiscing about a fond memory, or eating a picnic dinner in the park. A special moment can make a crappy day special.
Romancing the moment
A chaotic family life can often leave little time for romance, with it quite often appearing very low down on the priority list. It is all too easy to fall in a rut of just watching TV with your partner in silence once the kids are finally asleep. Talk more, touch more, have sex more. Get to know each other again. Remind yourself why you fell in love in the first place.
Little things can make a big difference, especially when you add them all up over days, weeks, months, years. Find magic in the moment and happiness will follow x